Xbox 360 Review: Alien: Isolation from Creative Assembly Delivers Genuine Scares

'Alien: Isolation' sets the foundation for what a proper game in the series should look like.

After last year's abysmal Aliens: Colonial Marines, the prospect of playing yet another title based on the famous film franchise filled me with dread. Thankfully, Alien: Isolation makes it clear out of the gate that this isn’t some action-based shooter that makes poor use of the license, but instead a tried-and-true homage to the original Ridley Scott classic, complete with a slick retro vibe and a gloomy, foreboding atmosphere that conjures the spirit of the timeless science fiction-horror masterpiece.

Fans who have been waiting to see Alien translated into a proper videogame finally have what they've they been looking for: A fun game that delivers the tense thrills and cheesy fun of the original movie. While not without its flaws and frustrations, Isolation's adherence to classic survival-horror mechanics and its dark cyberpunk setting make it a must-play for anyone craving some effective Xenomorph scares.

Movie Review: Men, Women & Children (2014)

A preachy, disjointed disaster. 

 

When leaving the theatre after seeing Men, Women & Children, the latest from Juno director Jason Reitman, my friends and I had varying views of what the movie was about. Discussions ranged from how it examines the irony of communication technology breeding a generation of poor communicators, to how it exposes the human race as a helpless collections of molecules, cursed to live on a giant rock in a vast universe that's doomed to collapse. At the time I presented another alternative. But I can’t recall what it was. To be honest, I don’t have a clue what the larger moral of the story is, but I am positive there is one, glaring at me and shoving itself in my face from beginning to end, like a reactive father trying to teach a complicated lesson that he himself had never thought of before this moment.

Movie Reivew: X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

Loosely based on the Chris Claremont comic arc of the same name, X-Men: Days of Future Past opens in a dark dystopian future, where a war with robotic soldiers -- called "sentinels" -- has left the mutant population devastated and helpless to fight back. On the run and fighting for their survival, the remaining mutants of the world have only one plan left: Send one of their own back in time, in hopes of stopping this bleak future from ever happening.

It’s an almost ironic plot, considering how truly horrible some of the X-Men film entries have been. Those who were hoping this outing would act as reboot for the dying franchise can rest easy: X-Men: Days of Future Past is not only the hands-down best film in the series, it may very well be the best comic book adaptation of all time.

Movie Review: Godzilla (2014)

The original 1954 Gojira ("Godzilla") was a dark film about the atomic bomb, in which a monster destroys everything in sight, and leaves little room for hope. It was a cathartic experience for a Japanese audience: An unstoppable force is causing destruction, and man is helpless to contain it, so they largely accept it. Riddled with metaphor, the film was Japan’s reaction to a horrible war crime that destroyed two cities and caused the death of millions of innocent people.

Godzilla then spawned a plethora of sequels, most of which abandoned the serious tone in favor of men in silly costumes fighting each other over the fate of the world, with the audience rooting for the now-likeable Godzilla. Typically the stories involved some monster menace wreaking havoc, and our scaly antihero would emerge from his slumber to kick some dopey-looking shrimp monster’s ass. Needless to say, these movies are loved largely only for their “B” charm.

So, which take does this new 2014 Godzilla remake go with? The simple answer is that it goes with the latter, all the while attempting to capture the tone of the former. The result is a monstrous disaster, culminating in a film with a script too weak to sell you on either its philosophy or its monster fights. Godzilla is neither smart nor fun, and considering the deceptive quality of the film’s trailer, it ends up being one of the biggest disappointments in modern memory.

Movie Review: Noah (2014)

 

When the opening credits rolled for Noah, a woman in attendance with me yelled “praise the Lord!”, which was then inexplicably followed by cheers from the crowd. It was obvious that a church group of some sort was in the theatre with me, made up of people likely unaware of the abstract moral complexity that is typically characteristic of a Darren Aronofsky film. I suppose the presence of Godly folk should be expected whenever one sees a movie based on a Bible story. Luckily for this congregation, they picked a relatively safe Aronofsky film to see, one that shies away from philosophizing about the backwards ethics at the heart of this Biblical end-of-the-world myth.

Aronofsky succeeds in telling the story of the Great Flood in a way which exposes its glorious absurdity. But he ultimately pulls his punches, seemingly out of fear of offending the Christian masses who will lead Noah to box office success. Inevitably, some of the faithful are going to be offended by what they see here regardless, but if the theatre I was in is any indication of how the public will react, many of the God-fearing are going to feel vindicated by this holy adaptation.

Instant Reaction: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)

I remember leaving the theatre after seeing Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End and I turned to my  

girlfriend at the time to ask her what she thought of the movie. She shrugged, and we continued our walk in silence, secretly reflecting on what we had just witnessed. After another minute of walking, the tension inside her boiled over and she let her feelings fly: “That movie is so beautiful that it makes me mad", she said, with genuine passion in her voice. "It’s so bad, but I’m so moved by it that I have to love it." She looked seriously distressed, but not necessarily in a bad way.

Tears were almost in her eyes as she recalled some of the film’s greatest moments; like the opening scene that sees a pirate boy hanged, or an astonishing ship battle in a whirlpool that left her in a state of awe. I share her sentiment completely; there’s so much to dislike about this film in terms of story, plot, and Johnny Depp antics. But when you focus on the score, the photography, and the truly fantastic special effects, it’s difficult not to lose yourself in the spectacle.

Once I was hooked in by the overwhelming quality of the score and visuals, I couldn’t help but love the characters and the witty dialogue. Further, once I began to let loose my rational inhibitions and let the film wash over me, the crazy antics, such as a marriage conducted during a sword fight, began to reveal their uniquely cinematic charm.

At World’s End strikes me on a purely visceral level and compels me to love it, even though the logical side of my brain can't stand it. And its successful in its mission, forcing me into its world despite my resistance. Even seven years after its release, I find myself still watching it and enjoying it. You could say it’s a guilty pleasure of mine, yet I feel no guilt nor shame for loving it. It’s a technical masterpiece, one that's truly awesome to be behold.

Directed by: Gore Verbinski
Starring: Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, and Keira Knightley

Movie Review: The LEGO Movie (2014)

 

My fear going into The LEGO Movie was that it would be an obvious 90 minute ad for the brand, sacrificing a chance to create a truly unique stop-animation feature. Strangely enough, my fears were partially realized. It is true that the movie is little more than a glorified advertisement, yet everything about it is so charmingly wonderful that I can’t help but love it, even if it’s trying to sell me a product. With incredible animation, a hilariously anarchic tone, and a surprisingly smart story, The LEGO Movie is a huge win. It intelligently blurs the line between art and commerce, forcing me to rethink the way I view advertising, which apparently can be a legitimate form of expression. This is the first great film of 2014, not to mention one of the best animated features in upwards of a decade.

The Most Underrated Movies of 2013

Critics shunned them, moviegoers ignored them, and award shows laughed at them. Still, despite all the negative press, some of the “worst” films of 2013 may actually be worth your time. Here’s a short list of “bad” movies that you should judge for yourself. 

Instant Reaction: In a World... (2013)

In a world where comedy is becoming uninspired and derivative, a new hero has arrived to breathe life into the genre. Her name is Lake Bell...

Hopefully you added appropriate emphasis and pauses while you read that. 

Ok, let me explain my cheesy intro. In a World… is a comedy with a rather unique concept, one that’s sure to please film buffs: Since the death of voice-over legend Don LaFontaine, the cliché words “in a world” have never been uttered during the opening of a film trailer. But a new wind is about to blow. It seems Hollywood is ready to revive the phrase which, as we’re told, is an extremely big deal for anyone who sweet talks a mic for a living. Every hilariously egotistical voice actor in the business dreams of a chance to fill the shoes of the late LaFontaine -- and if not, at least this is a fresh idea for a comedy.

In a World… is unexpectedly original and super charming, putting the talents of auteur writer/director/star Lake Bell on display in glorious fashion. If this is a sign of what’s to come for Bell, we may finally live in a world where someone other than Wes Anderson has the exclusive rights to make quirky comedies for hipsters. But only time can tell us for sure.

Directed by: Lake Bell
Starring: Lake Bell, Fred Melamed, and Demetri Martin

Movie Review: All is Lost (2013)

I’m known for liking experimental films that sacrifice entertainment value in order to explore something interesting. I knew what I was getting into when I sat down to watch All is Lost, a film featuring Robert Redford trapped on a sinking boat. I expected to see largely only Redford on screen for the entire film, and I even expected some stretches to be uneventful. But what I didn’t expect was that I would be bored to death for the entire duration, only to have the film conclude itself in the worst way imaginable.

Movie Review: American Hustle (2013)

There’s something glorious about the chaos of American Hustle, a comedy-crime drama that’s both hard to watch and unbelievably compelling at the same time. Director David O. Russell (Silver Linings Playbook, The Fighter) has crafted one of the most fiercely entertaining films of the year; it’s both intense and downright hilarious from beginning to end, taking pride in its ability to create memorable moments, scene after scene. 

The energy level that Russell is able to maintain on screen is astonishing. American Hustle takes you on a ride and doesn’t let go, keeping you drawn in through all its insane twists and turns. I was never sure how I should react to what I was seeing, but I think that’s the point. The movie teases the audience, compelling you to laugh or empathize with its characters, only to tear away your fleeting reaction in the next frame. It’s as if Russell is scolding us for attempting to feel anything deeper than what’s presented. Every serious moment is followed with something comical; every moment of humor is wrapped in a layer of depression, and that’s just how it’s supposed to be. This is a film that lives in the moment. 

Movie Review: Shadow People (2013)

 

I’ve experienced night terrors, episodes of sleep paralysis, and other sleep disturbances for most of my life. As I’ve gotten older, I don’t worry about them too much; however, the science behind dreams still fascinates me. It’s the types of nightmares I would sometimes experience -- images of shadowy figures that enter my room at night -- that are the subject of Shadow People, a low-budget horror film that delivers more confusion than scares. A great effort was made by the marketing team to make you think this movie is real, but without an effective payoff, the docu-fiction approach of the film fails to hit the mark – in fact, it comes nowhere close.

Instant Reaction: Drive (2011)

Drive is one of those movies that is slow from start to finish, and it's proud of that stylistic choice. Despite its shallow, simple story about a stuntman who moonlights as a getaway driver and falls in love with his oblivious neighbor, the film delivers some genuine emotion, thanks to the effectively quiet romance between co-stars Ryan Gosling and Carey Mulligan.

But it’s more than just the acting that hooked me. When contrasted with the slow pacing and the moody soundtrack, the moments of abrupt graphic violence are so shocking that they carve a spot for themselves in your memory with little effort, culminating in an effective work of visual poetry. This is a movie that's all style -- and that's a compliment, because it works. My brain has trouble reconciling how a film like Drive can be so methodical, yet hit home on a purely visceral level. I can’t get it out of my head.

Directed by: Nicolas Winding Refn
Starring: Ryan Gosling, Carey Mulligan, and Bryan Cranston

Movie Review: The Lone Ranger (2013)

Director Gore Verbinski's Pirates of the Caribbean breathed unexpected new life into swashbucklers with its modern action and compelling adventure narrative. With Lone Ranger, Verbinski tries to set a new standard for westerns in much the same way -- and if not for a weak script, he may have succeeded. 

To date, critics worldwide have panned The Lone Ranger for its generic plot and overdose of an unnecessarily wacky Tonto (Johnny Depp). I completely understand a lot of the criticism, yet I still find myself very attracted to the film all the same. In terms of photography, score, visual effects, and art direction, Lone Ranger is one of the best films of 2013. It invigorates the stale western genre by infusing modern style, all the while not sacrificing the props, costumes, and real set pieces that make the old westerns great.

Xbox 360 Review: Adventure Time: Explore the Dungeon Because I DON’T KNOW

Adventure Time is one of the most creative, ingenious, and completely awesome cartoons to ever grace television. Considering that, it may come as a shock to hear that this video game adaptation, Explore the Dungeon Because I DON’T KNOW, is anything but. All of the charm and crazy, random humor from the cartoon is absent, and instead gamers are delivered a repetitive, boring dungeon crawler with so little charm that you wonder if the title was meant to be ironic. Why the hell does this game have me exploring dungeon after dungeon, completing inane quests and doing the same thing over and over again? Honestly, I don’t know.

Movie Review: Despicable Me 2 (2013)

Felonious Gru (Steve Carell) has given up on his career as a super villain, and now enjoys a quiet life as father who makes less-than-delicious fruit jellies in his basement.  But when a new bad guy threatens the world with a powerful mutagen, Gru joins the Anti-Villain League, lead by the all-too-British Silas Ramsbottom (Steve Coogan), in hopes of thwarting any nefarious plans. And since he wasn’t so keen on living a life as a jam chef, a return to the crime business is exactly what Gru has been longing for – even if he’s now on the other side.

Despicable Me 2 isn’t as fresh and fun as the first, but it is a crowd-pleasing animated spectacle sure to make kids smile -- and maybe a few parents. The same wit and clever writing that made the first film stand out is still here, but it’s hampered now by an excess of minions. Lots of minions. Too many minions. The cute little guys overtake the film, forcing the smarter moments to sit in the backseat, which is a real shame. Because I’ve got to tell you, they’re kind of a one joke act — all they do is screw things up and hurt themselves over and over again.

Movie Review: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (2013)

 

Walter Mitty (Ben Stiller) sported a mohawk as a young boy, skateboarded with his friends, and had an idealistic, punk rock image of how he would live his life. But along the way, reality trapped him. The monotony of daily life took over his identity, and Walter found himself working as a Negative Asset Manager -- or a photo archivist -- for Life magazine, living an adventurous life vicariously through the images of photographer Sean O’Connell (Sean Penn).

Walter “zones out” constantly and day dreams that he’s another man, one less suppressed by the world and more in control of his own destiny. Sometimes his dreams mold perfectly into reality, culminating in a beautiful, surreal amalgam of wish fulfillment. Other times they are less enchanting, becoming manic special-effects-ridden spectacles that don’t fit well with the tone of the film – in fact, they sometimes detract from it.  While the fantasies work to add to the depth of the themes and characters, toning them down wouldn’t hurt at all.

Much like its protagonist, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty suffers from an identity crisis, unsure if it wants to be a wacky family comedy or a quieter, sweeter film about a man who is inspired to live a fulfilling life. It’s the latter that works far more, and it’s the former I could do without completely. I found myself wishing Walter’s fantasies were more grounded, giving me more insight into what goes on in his head.

The strange thing is that, while I know this movie is flawed (and makes a much better trailer than it does a two hour film), it still moved me on a level that few other works have accomplished. If you can get past its zany shortcomings, this really is one of the better movies of the year — when the tone and images on screen fall into sync, the result is truly spectacular.