Top Ten Movies of 2012

With the Oscars just around the corner about to prove once again how irrelevant they are by making some strange movie picks, the time has come to look back on 2012 cinema and choose the ten best films the year had to offer. It’s important to note that I didn’t have the luxury of seeing absolutely everything that came out this year, so an omission from this list is not necessarily an indication that I won’t love it.

I will say that there are several films this year that, judging by critical consensus, I expected to be head-over-heels for but ended up only tolerating (Holy Motors, Zero Dark Thirty, Lincoln). There are also a multitude of others that I enjoyed very much, but had trouble committing to putting them in my top ten (Bernie, ParaNorman, The Sessions).

Limiting myself to a top ten was no easy task. This really was one hell of a year for movies, and the completion was stiff. Without further ado, here are the best motion pictures of 2012:

Movie Review: Django Unchained (2012)

Django Unchained is brutal, sickly comical, and often hard to watch. That being said, it’s also a smart film about racism and slavery, masterfully crafted by talented filmmaker Quentin Tarantino. A late arrival during 2012, Django Unchained should be in the conversation for best picture of the year, if critics can get past the excessive gore and racist language. Tarantino crosses the boundaries of what is comfortable in order to shock, amuse, and drive home a powerful message into your brain – and he succeeds completely on all counts.

This satirical revival of the Blaxploitation genre tells the story of a bounty-hunting dentist who frees a slave named Django (Jamie Foxx) in order to help him track down his latest reward. Feeling responsible for the man he freed, Dr. King Schultz (Christopher Waltz) teaches Django how to shoot, read, and even promises to help him free the woman he loves from a rich slaver, Calvin J. Candie (Leonardo DiCaprio).

The romance between Django and his bride, Broomhilda Von Shaft (Kerry Washington), is one of the weaker aspects of the narrative. However, the relationship between Django and Dr. Schultz is surprisingly deep for a Tarantino movie; their mutual growth serves to push the plot forward.

The story unfolds in a series of episodic acts, each feeling like its own stand-alone arc. This approach is something fans of Tarantino are likely accustomed to, though I will add that it works better here than in Inglourious Basterds.

Movie Review: The Hobbit - An Unexpected Journey (2012)

Few can deny the significance The Lord of the Rings trilogy has had on film as a whole. It’s a lost art in terms of the way movies are made – model sets, props, makeup, costumes, and as many real actors as possible. The trilogy is an incredible achievement, sporting a level of craftsmanship and quality that very few films can match. Regrettably, the first chapter of a new prequel trilogy, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, contains little of what made the Lord of the Rings so magnificent.

I went back and watched The Fellowship of the Ring before I saw The Hobbit, and to this day I’m still blown away by the excellent photography and art direction. The real outdoor shoots, the beautiful lighting, the gorgeous crafted models – all of this is what makes the experience so memorable. These choices earned the trilogy multiple awards and recognition from critics worldwide, something The Hobbit is unlikely to achieve.

It’s baffling to me that the same director, Peter Jackson, and cinematographer, Andrew Lesnie, are responsible for both An Unexpected Journey and The Fellowship of the Ring. All those actors who played orcs and goblins are now merely CGI creatures, and the wonderful model locations have been replaced with green screen and CGI effects. Everything looks dramatically different, and in this case, that isn't a good thing.

Movie Review: Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (2012)



Have you ever watched a movie and thought that what you are seeing had the potential to be a masterpiece, but falls short thanks to some very strange choices? It’s a sad thing to have to say about any film, but it’s especially sad to say about Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, a movie that has moments of absolute perfection. There’s so much about this quirky comedy that I loved, but severe shifts in the tone stop it from being all that it could have been.

Seeking a Friend is about doomsday and two people who fall in love in the most unusual of circumstances. A meteor is set to wipe out all human life on Earth, and Dodge (Steve Carell) is regretting every moment of his existence. Teaming up with his new friend, Penny (Keira Knightley), the two head out on a road trip to find Dodge’s lost love – something he should have done a long time ago.

Movie Review: Maximum Conviction (2012)

My friends and I were bored one night and decided to see what kind of bad movies we could rent and enjoy with a few beers. I certainly wasn't in the mindset for a good movie -- I simply wanted to relax with a guilty pleasure. I wanted something my friends and I could laugh at it in an intoxicated state, and just have a good time.

The very first mistake I made that night was renting Maximum Conviction, a film starring action legend Steven Seagal and WWE Superstar Stone Cold Steve Austin. You'd think a movie starring such an awesomely-terrible cast would offer some mindless entertainment, but you'd be wrong. Maximum Conviction is one of the most incredibly boring films I have ever seen, with acting and filmmaking that is so poor, you begin to wonder if there's some cruel god out there who just wants mankind to suffer.

I wanted some mind-numbing action from Maximum Conviction, and nothing more. There are plenty of gun shots and strange fist fights, but somehow none of it is cool to watch in the least.

Movie Review: Skyfall (2012)

If the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has any sense of objectivity left, they should look to Skyfall for an award for Best Director, or at the very least Best Cinematography. Director Sam Mendes and cinematographer Roger Deakins have crafted not only the best looking film of 2012, but easily the best looking 007 ever made. Skyfall is nothing short of absolutely magnificent, with a quality to the direction and photography that is truly Oscar caliber.

I hear claims that Skyfall is the best Bond film ever made, and I think that could be true – at the very worst, it comes in second just behind Casino Royale (2006). In a way the two films are similar: Both give us a look at a James Bond who feels real, suffering from the same human condition as the rest of us. It’s a take on the franchise that I’m glad Sam Mendes decided to keep, especially considering Skyfall feels as though it was made to celebrate Bond’s 50-year film history.

Somehow the creators behind Skyfall have managed to make an ode to franchise, while simultaneously maintaining the film’s distinct identity. The Aston Martin DB5 famously driven during Goldfinger (1964) makes a triumphant return in Skyfall, complete with cheesy machine guns hidden below the headlights. Moments like these exist to provide fan service, but still fit in with the mood of Skyfall, which portrays Daniel Craig’s Bond as an aging relic refusing to accept his limitations.

Movie Review: Dredd 3D (2012)

Judge Dredd is a badass who obeys the law -- perfectly. When he’s sent out to train his new psychic rookie, Judge Anderson (Olivia Thirlby), the two find themselves locked down in a gang infested city block, where the only justice crime knows is pain. Dredd 3D is an immensely-fun action thriller that gets right what the 1995 Judge Dredd got so very wrong.

From the opening scene, it’s obvious that Dredd isn’t the type of film that takes itself seriously. This is a bloody satire that, if it wasn’t done right, could have been a colossal failure. The costumes are silly, the setting is hilariously bleak, and the characters aren’t exactly original -- and that’s exactly why it works so well.

Dredd is based on the long running comic strip Judge Dredd which is famous for its tongue-in-cheek approach to tackling important themes, like anarchism and the growing police state. The cyberpunk strip shocked readers with its dystopian visuals and gritty storylines, many of which were very influential in shaping the future of comics.

This latest film adaptation is a successful update that is sure to please fans and newcomers alike. Much like the comic strip that came before it, Dredd is a smart movie, though on its face it may seem like nothing more than a “B” production with a big budget.

DVD Review: Starship Troopers: Invasion (2012)

Starship Troopers: Invasion is the fourth entry in the film series, and the first to be done in full CGI. There’s all the blood and boobs here you’d expect from a Starship Troopers movie; however, the gore and poorly-animated female butts will only appeal to sad pubescent boys. Those of you who are all grown up are advised to rent something else.

The first Starship Troopers (1997) is a guilty pleasure of mine. The hyper-violent original is a fun movie, if you can get past the poor direction and terrible acting. Sadly, the two direct-to-video sequels that follow lack the appeal of the original and, in my opinion, are virtually unwatchable. Invasion is definitely an improvement over the last two films, but it still doesn’t have the same cool factor as the first outing -- in part due to the fact that this is an animated movie.

My first impression of the animation was that it looked terrible. Invasion feels more like a video game than a movie; all the characters look stiff and rigid, as if they came straight from a video game cinematic. Eventually I got used to the CGI, but nothing ever looks particularly good. The animation is in desperate need of some creativity, and it lacks any defining value worth mentioning.

Movie Review: ParaNorman (2012)

ParaNorman is not only the best animated film I’ve seen this year, it’s one of the best films of 2012, period. This stop-motion-style movie, directed by Chris Butler and Sam Fell (Flushed Away), fills a void left by Pixar’s surprisingly disappointing Brave, released earlier this year. Finally Pixar’s crown passes to the animators at LAIKA, who previously worked on Henry Selick’s Academy Award-nominated Coraline.

ParaNorman is the story of Norman (Kodi Smit-McPhee), a boy born with the ability to speak to the dead and foresee the terrible events of the future. When an ancient witch’s curse threatens the Massachusetts town of Blithe Hollow, Norman is the only hope the once-puritanical borough has for salvation.

Movie Review: The Expendables 2

The Expendables 2 is a huge improvement over its predecessor,  full of bloody action, self-depreciative quips, and a whole lot more Arnold Schwarzenegger. While this testosterone-fueled  action flick may not be for everyone, fans of the star-studded cast will find exactly what they’ve been looking for -- explosions, gunshots, and a whole lot of fun.

It’s unreasonable to expect a movie that exists only to package together a ridiculously-cool cast to be much more than just a good time. The first Expendables (2010) was a huge disappointment, focusing too strongly on its very weak plot, while not providing enough of the action moviegoers hoped to see.

The story in Expendables 2 is definitely lacking, but still strong enough to tie all the fist fights, gun battles, and jokes about Randy Couture’s ears together into one cohesive package.

There’s a story here about a bad guy who is so evil that he enslaves women and children to dig in his mines, searching for a stash of old soviet warheads.The film’s villain, Jean Vilain (Jean-Claude Van Damme), seems to have an endless supply of henchmen and weapons at his disposable. His motivations remain unclear, likely because he’s just too evil to be understood by a movie audience with normal ambitions.

Movie Review: The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

I had to see The Dark Knight Rises twice before I knew exactly how I felt about it. Leaving the theatre after the first viewing, I felt thoroughly let down. After my second screening I found myself still retaining some of the same disappointment; however, I was able to look at the film more objectively, and come to some mixed conclusions. So, as a huge fan of Christopher Nolan’s Batman saga, I can finally say this: The entire trilogy is an incredible achievement, but Rises is absolutely the weakest entry in the series.

Part of the problem here is the level of expectation I had going into this final chapter. The first two, Batman Begins (2005) and The Dark Knight (2008), were incredible films, packed with a level of depth not previously seen in any comic-book adaptation. My desire for this third movie to match its predecessors in quality is a tall order in and of itself, but part of me had been hyped to believe Rises would be the best in the series.

Movie Review: Prometheus (2012)

Ridley Scott’s Prometheus is a bold film that sends its characters on a journey to find truth, only to leave them with as many questions as they have answers. This is one of the best science fiction films in modern memory, and it will leave you feeling completely mesmerized from beginning to end.

Prometheus is a Ridley Scott film, so it’s no surprise that it looks absolutely incredible. The visuals are dark, haunting, and truly original. This is the best looking movie I have seen this year, and it may very well be one of the best looking science fiction films of all time.

If you’re looking for scares, you will still find a lot of great horror moments in Prometheus, many of which will bring back memories of the original Alien (1979). One scene in particular, involving an emergency extraction surgery, is the modern equivalent of the famous 'chest burst' scene that shocked audiences more than 30 years ago.

Movie Review: Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)

Snow White and the Huntsman  is a complete re-imagining of the classic German fairy tale. While this latest adaptation contains dark imagery aimed at adults, it's still the same fairy tale you've always known, right down to the Seven Dwarfs. This may make some of the purists happy, but it will unfortunately leave many moviegoers wanting a whole lot more.

Yes, in this version of the film there are battles between armies and some vicious fantastical monsters; however, these elements do very little in terms of adding something new to the same old story. Instead these scenes feel like additions made only to meet the audience's fantasy film expectations.

The epic battles (which don't seem all that epic) feel like an aside to the fairy tale and don't mesh very well into the story. We're told that Snow White is supposed to lead an army against the Evil Queen and restore her father's kingdom, but the reasons behind Snow White's charisma aren't properly articulated and are never well examined.